Tuesday, September 7, 2010

my fiction beats the hell out of my truth

heyyyy dudes. i had a pretty low-key, uneventful weekend. on friday, i actually went out somewhere ! christina and i met amber at the south philly tap room. i haven't seen amber in like a billion years because she moved out to the sticks a few years ago, but she's back ! it was really great to see her. the south philly tap room is famous because they used to serve lion meat, but they don't serve that now and they didn't have any vegetarian lion meat.


i got a strawberry and asparagus salad, which probably sounds disgusting but was very delicious (it was a warm salad with spinach and pine nuts and goat cheese and red onions), and... a tomato sandwich. it was the special, and one of my ultimate comfort foods, and it was really good, but paying $8 for that sandwich is insane. also it was on really thick good bread, which is sort of a nightmare when your sandwich fillings are like, some goo.


after dinner, we went to capo giro to get gelato (i got dark chocolate and this weird candied black cherry one that is The Best) and hung out. it was so so so nice to see amber. after that, we came home and i can't remember what happened after that. i probably stayed up real late.

on saturday, christina and i went to pick up her computer and get a cord to transfer stuff from my old computer, and we went to loop to visit amber (two days in a row !). seriously, loop is my favorite yarn store ever. they have an awesome selection and everything is really well-stocked, and they put the prices on everything. they also have really good sales. i got two balls of noro chirimen #1 and another ball of sheep shop yarn.

noro chirimen
noro chirimen #1

sheep shop one
sheep shop one, lilac

when we got home, i went over to mouse's to watch mouse and mike wrestle. that wasn't too bad, i mostly just sat on a blanket in the grass- it was actually almost cold out ! then we got indian buffet for dinner, which was already more bland and less spicy cause the penn kids are back, and went to capo giro again (!). then mike came over to my house to watch survivorman.

on sunday, mouse and i met up and ate a late lunch in fairmount park. we picked a random spot and there was like one thousand geese there (to my delight and mouse's chagrin). mouse wasn't feeling well so he didn't even protest too much when i fed the geese some (pitted) cherries. i really should not have fed them anything butttt they came up to me and it was really cute and scary, cause geese are assholes. it's also funny because the geese were hanging out on a bike path, and instead of running off to the sides into the grass when bikes came, they'd haul ass down the bike path. luv u, geese.


after the park, we came back to my house and watched the terminator. maybe it's because i'd never seen it in HD before, but i never noticed that you can see arnold's dong in the beginning? also, i really want to buy the shirt kyle reese wears from old navy or something.

michael biehn
i posted that sentiment on facebook and my brother said "didn't he just wear a trenchcoat over a flashbeagle shirt?"

yesssssssterday i was supposed to go see mouse's band, but i got horrible diarrhea from the pound of cherries i ate the day before (i'm worried about the geese !) what better day than to finish the girl with the dragon tattoo. i thought this would be a fun book to read to make fun of, but it was actually like the dullest garbage ever and not even fun/funny !

girl with the dragon tattoo

so, if you haven't read this book, i'll save you the trouble- the plot is that this disgraced journalist gets hired to investigate the disappearance of a wealthy industrialist's niece in the 60s. it turns out that her brother and father are serial killers and serial rapists and she ran away to australia to live in secrecy or something. and also some boring stuff about business.

- the book was super poorly translated, either by someone who doesn't speak english or someone who doesn't speak swedish
- it was basically like.. rape and torture porn?
- it took 350 fucking pages for something interesting to happen and then they dragged it out for like 350 more pages
- the business stuff? no one gives a shit.
- he forgot to really put the title character in the book, and repeated the same things about her over and over and over again- an ANOREXIC BITCH, socially awkward, socially retarded, damaged, a VICTIM, pierced eyebrows, tattoos, etc. also does anyone else think that 95lbs at "just barely 4'11" doesn't sound that skinny? it's small but it's in the normal weight range for that height.
- i mentioned this before, but he forgot to make lisbeth salander socially awkward in her interactions with people, despite telling us that she was 100000 times, and he forgot to make mikael blomkvist charming in HIS interactions despite telling us he was 100000 times.
- the rape and torture was just tooooooo fucking over the top and unnecessary and unbelievable
- there were too many fucking people in the vanger family. i kept having to flip back to see who people were.
- super poorly edited
- the book was also basically an advertisement for apple computers and he never once said 'his computer' or 'her laptop', it was always 'his ibook' or 'her powerbook'.

i have a million other complaints with how crappy this stupid book was but i can't even remember them cause it was so boring.

soooooo, my classes start thursday. i'm really nervous about getting books and stuff ! i got the syllabuses for both classes, and they both mention a required text, but then they also mention other books we'll be reading in the weekly plans, so am i supposed to buy those too? i'm really nervous in general because i haven't been to an actual classroom in like ten years. buhhh what if everyone hates me and i'm too stupid for school?

i'm at work now, and i look really cool.

p.s. once my friend diana posted on a messageboard about those tomato sandwiches and this dude said, "ahhhh, the classic t"
p.p.s. Initially, Zona's cause of death was listed as "everlasting faint"; later, this was changed to "childbirth".


  1. i will feed the crap out of every goose, i can't help it.

  2. i gave them some vegan cornbread too :O

  3. the only bad thing about feeding a goose is when you run out of food. one time i fed a bunch of geese by the river some cake and when i ran out they horded together and CHASED ME and i got pecked!!! it was thrilling and funny.