we can finally start a family

i'm uncharacteristically updating my blog on a friday night ! i want to make sure that i cover all the great stuff that happened last week, despite the one major, major, major, major bummer.

last wednesday, nick and sandi came down from nyc and we had the besttttt timmmmmeeeee. we went to south philly tap room, where i got the most delicious eggplant parm i've ever had (and everyone else had the best brussels sprouts they've ever had- but they had bacon) and a really delicious apple and watercress salad, as well as a couple of delicious san diego beers (recommended by gavin, the biggest proponent of san diego ever). nick and sandi were like... fucking adorable and delightful and hilarious as always. nick has a new haircut where he looks like half of a depeche mode video and sandi said a thousand hilarious things. we came home after dinner and (wahhhhh) played with weirdo and had the best family night.



on thursday, i cooked all day and like... every single thing i made came out weird. it ended up not mattering, though, because jeanne's new roommate alexis made a shitload of super delicious food. jeanne, mike, alexis, ned, and i had a good thanksgiving and watched the kids in the hall.



the menu was:
- seitan turkey
- vegetarian ham
- stuffing
- cornbread stuffing
- mashed potatoes
- shepherds pie
- cranberry sauce
- orange honey cranberry sauce
- delicious gravy
- roasted vegetables (potatoes, sweet potatoes, brussels sprouts, parsnips, carrots)

there was a surprising lack of dessert (the dessert i made was overcooked and i burnt my ganache !) but i'd rather have food than dessert anyway. i had the best time, though ! ned had a good story about his customers that i am still laughing about, alexis is super cute and nice and has a really cool mean cat, mike is my favorite, and jeanne is ESPECIALLY my favorite. vinegar and fig too !

on friday, i worked on school work a little, and then christina and i braved local 44 again. i don't know if i've talked about it here, but i had the worst meal of my life at local 44 when i went with bill and christina- it was like... "mushroom stew" that was just unseasoned boiled mushrooms, pearl onions, carrots, and potatoes, and it tasted like they were boiled, rinsed, and boiled in new water. i seriously like recoil in horror every time i walk by because it was so gross ! anyway, we braved it because we were cold, and the food was awesome. i got a vegan reuben, and we split disco fries (fries with onion gravy and cheese) and it was... very heavy, but delicious.



i also tried some new scotches- i tried laphroaig and dewars, and of course they were both gross. guys, what's with scotch? why do i keep drinking it? one of these days, though, i'm going to love it. i know it. on saturdayyyyyyyy, mouse came over and we watched a few episodes of it's always sunny in philadelphia and ate delicious food and played with weirdo (wahhhhhh).

on sunday, i met up with mouse and kati to go to berlin mart in new jersey ! we met up with meesh and greg there, and we saw a lot of funny things and mouse made me laugh so hard that all of the people at the flea market thought i was behaving inappropriately for a flea market. it was a great fucking day ! i got:

- a greedo
- a yoda
- two jawas
- a grizzlor (a he-man guy- i got him for jeanne cause someone made him into a magnet)
- some work gloves (even though i don't do work)
- the best possible hairclip



after that, we went to blackbird pizza, where i was psyched to try a seitan cheesesteak, but they were out of seitan. they had some pizza and stuff butttttttttt i'm not vegan and i can eat real pizza so spending $3 on slices of vegan pizza didn't seem appetizing, so i just had some water and a good, awkward sulk. annnnnnd then we came home and weirdo died.

this past week has just been... stress and studying. next week is my last week of classes, and i have four papers to finish- 1 two page but with heavy research, 2 one page with heavy research, and one 10 page with heavy research. my genocide final paper is stressing me out a lot- i wrote a proposal that was mostly based on like... my strong emotional reaction and not a lot of research that i did, and my professor wrote this back (she actually wrote one email with this praise and then wrote a second cause she forgot she sent the first, with MORE INTENSE PRAISE):

"This is going to be a great paper. In fact, you could probably publish it--if you feel like putting the extra work into it (which need not be done for the version you hand in as a final paper in this class). I would be happy to help you polish it and send it out. The idea you will be pursuing is very innovative and also very important. It could put women on the genocide map, so to speak. And it would bring necessary attention to their suffering--their suffering as survivors not just of a genocidal process, but also of genocide written on their bodies and lives"

i know that someone suggesting that an undergraduate freshman publish something is a big insane compliment, but it put this insane amount of pressure on me- i feel super unsophisticated and emotional and like i barely even know what i'm talking about? like i'm just kind of chauncey gardenering my way through this.



so, this week? studying reading freaking the fuck out and not being able to do a bunch of shit and alksdlksajdlkjalskjdklsajs alas poor roxy. anyway, i just wanted to get that out.

cool thoughts on the present situation

first ! christine, brooke, and i started our history blog, cool thoughts. the name is based on a document brooke and i saw at the benjamin franklin underground museum called cool thoughts on the present situation of our public affairs (authored by one benjamin franklin, alias mrs. silence dogood), and the blog is woefully located on tumblr because the name "cool thoughts" is literally taken everywhere else, and is mostly parked domains or blogs of like, "confucious say..." shit and doors quotes. alas ! anyway, the purpose of the blog is for us to post anything we are reading about or interested in throughout history, in any format, whenever we want. if you'd like to contribute something (anything !), please send it to coolthoughts@nervous.org.



one of my main goals here is to get comfortable talking about things i know about< without the crippling fear of being wrong or considered "not smart enough"- this is a problem many people have, i'm sure, but women specifically are made to feel intellectually inferior or like they have to apologize for or soften their opinions. it may not seem like i have a big problem with this if you know me, but it's something i struggle with every day- especially in regard to my lack of formal education.

what else ! i've been taking an ill-advised break from reading for the past few days because my brain needed a break, which means i'm going to have to really and sincerely bust ass all weekend to get everything done. i have a research proposal, a few essays, and a rough draft for my genocide paper due. i'm actually waiting for my professor's feedback for the rough draft- she's really awesome but can be a little slow with stuff over e-mail, and our class meeting is canceled this week. anyway, i've been mostly farting around watching simpsons dvds, and it's been... heavenly.


i only have seasons 5-9

i also ended up breaking down and buying cataclysm, the next world of warcraft expansion. i am waffling about whether or not i want to play- like, i just don't have time for wow anymore with school, and i have mixed feelings about the new 10 man raiding structure. like, i love the dudes (and two women) i play with, but i often found myself being the 11th man when 10 mans were forming up previously. i'm not the most amazing player, but i was better than some other people who were chosen, and that was because i had a lot of personality conflicts with some shitty random norms in the guild (like a handful of idiot privilege denyin' dudes who wanted to be able to call women bitches and stuff). luckily those dudes were sort of phased out or alienated (by me !) so there's a small chance things will be different now, but who knows? yesterday was a patch day, and the world was ripped apart and orgrimmar was redesigned, and everything honestly looks pretty cool. i also saved the name astralweeks for a goblin shaman. sigh. i really like this fucking game, who am i kidding.



what else ! oh ! nick and sandi are coming today ! sandi told me not to eat anything in anticipation of a family dinner? which is exciting and also easy to do because i'm only at work for 3 hours today and i forgot to bring lunch and also i have zero groceries that aren't thanksgiving ingredients (actually i have some trader joe's burritos i guess). i'm excited to see them because it's been figuratively forever. also i get to bro down with christina, who just got back from san francisco.

my plans for the break? cooking, hanging out, thanksgiving with jeanne and mike, reading, writing, agonizing, procrastinating, simpsons, history, internet. i gotta get some work done in my last 30 minutes at work, though, so.. ttyl. happy thanksgiving !

he knows where she is

hollllllllyyyyy shit ! everyone is so fucking annoying this morning ! my coworkers will not stop fucking talking to each other ! guys, shut up ! it's fucking monday ! shut up ! stop talking ! that said, we had a staff breakfast this morning and they got vegetarian sausage just for me, but i'm not sure it was worth it i'm currently on hour two of breakfast being THE MOST INTERESTING FUCKING THING TO EVER HAPPEN that everyone can't stop fucking talking about !



i'm so reluctant to do anything today that i've been read the wikipedia entry for vladimir putin's dog for like 15 minutes.

so ! the weekend ! on friday, i came home and farted around and went to bed super early (midnight, which is early for me), because i had a day of exciting errands planned ! but i was incredibly exhausted all day and ended up... sleeping until 2pm. i didn't even take a shower or get dressed until like... 7? i had a runny nose and headache and was sure i was getting sick, but i think i just needed water and caffeine. i met up with mouse, benji, nate, and anna for all-you-can-eat ethiopian at ethio cafe, a new ethiopian restaurant directly next door to the one i usually go to.



the staff was super nice, and they specifically referred to everything as "vegan," and the food was good, but i can't eat all that much ethiopian food. a regular entree at abyssinia (the place next door) is the same price, and i probably eat the same amount both ways. i may continue to just go to abyssinia, though i feel guilty cause the women running this place were so attentive and sweet, and the quality of food was not appreciably different.

after dinner, mouse came over and let me windbag him with my incomplete knowledge of genocide- it was a very interesting role reversal, because usually HE is the windbag. it felt like how it probably feels when those high powered businessmen on craigslist have to dress like a baby and get spanked to have an orgasm ! i didn't have an orgasm though, i guess. maybe mouse did, i forgot to ask.



on sunday morning, i woke up and met mouse and kev for breakfast at green line, where we had bagels and coffee. i love when jesse (and patchie) are working because they make the best lattes. i love when eric is working too because he's funny and has a great beard, but he makes coffee drinks that actually taste like coffee which isn't really my m.o. it was nice to see kev and catch up, because i haven't seen him in a million years ! after breakfast, i got a car and went to whole foods and got cat food. i'm preparing my menu for our delicious friendsgiving at jeanne's house- she and mike are getting back from romania right before, so we are going to have thanksgiving at their house (plus her friend alexis who i am super super excited to meet will be there and cooking !). here's what i'm making (vegetarian versions of all):



vegetarian ham ! i'm going to make an apple cider/brown sugar/mustard glaze, which i don't usually use a recipe for and just WING.



caramlized onion and cornbread stuffing



roasted potatoes, carrots, parsnips, and brussels sprouts



orange honey cranberry sauce



mini orange chocolate chunk cakes (jeanne's will be an orange pecan cake since she doesn't like chocolate !)

anyway, after shopping i came home and relaxed and didn't do any school work and felt okay about that. i got through a whole lot of simpsons episodes this weekend- first i flagellated myself with DVR'd recent episodes and then i rewarded myself by watching season 6.


no, you owe ME $900 !

my goals right now are to get through this week at work (2.5 days !), get through class tonight, finish my essays for writing class, and write my paper for genocide class. my BIG paper. it's going to be a super fucking busy holiday ! also, brooke, christine, and i are starting a history blog together and i need to work on that !

p.s. christina gets back from SF tonight and i can't wait to hugggggg her

walk the dinosaur

hey dudes ! i had a wonderful and very benadrylled weekend ! on friday, i came home and actually wrote my essay- i had to write an essay about huckleberry finn, and then write an essay about my essay where i went through every line and had to paraphrase each line (to say what it SAYS) and then explain what each line DOES. it wasn't as tedious as it sounds ! then i had to read a chapter of beyond the culture wars by gerald graff and do a SAYS/DOES outline for that. what a weird book- this is my first year back at school in a billion years and it is some like... weird academic-y jargon-y book about problems in academia. why would i care about that? i have no clue what he's even talking about. like, going to school to learn about going to school doesn't seem interesting to me.



the class is pretty rough. so far it is like... middle school type stuff, but the instruction is muddled and the assignments are tedious. i'm bummed, because i have a lot to learn about writing and i'm not sure i'm going to learn it in this (required) class. we have to do a class blog and i know that not everyone is a superstar blogger or whatever, but everyone's entries are so weird and tedious and are a mishmash of incomplete sentences. also even though they can be about ANYTHING, most people write about the class. i feel like a jerk complaining about it though !

on saturday, i went to hannah's to meet my new kitten !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hannah found a teeny tiny baby kitten, and i get to take her home in 3 weeks. she's about 3 weeks old now (though she seems to be around 4 weeks developmentally and 3 weeks in size? so she may just be tiny). she is seriously like... the cutest kitten in the world. she put her paws on my face and nibbled on my chin and alksjdkaslks she's so cute. hannah is a saint for taking care of her !



after that, i went to target to get some qtips and new bedding and ended up running into jeanne, mike, ryann, and ned ! and then a few minutes later, benji ! it was pretty neat, except i was self-conscious about my eye and the fact that i was sort of covered in kitten pee. i got some bedding and some qtips and headed home, where i met up with mouse and benji (again !), fresh from their jiu jitsu lesson. i made them spaghetti with field roast sausages:



and mouse and i tried to sell benji on band of brothers. benji isn't a tv person but he's a cool human so he'd probably love band of brothers. i got to hang out with mouse a little too after benji left, which was nice because i don't get to see him as much because of school.

on sunnnnnday, i did some reading for my genocide class- this week we have to read saviors and survivors by mahmood mamdani. it's about darfur, and my professor said that she considers it to be genocide denial. so far, that seems pretty right on, but i have to claim ignorance here and say that i really don't know enough about darfur to know if what he's saying is completely preposterous.



i have a lot more reading to do, because i hope to write my paper for the class about genocide denial, so i think i need to actually stick to my plan of reading when i'm supposed to be reading ! after doing some reading, though, i went to jeanne and mike's house for fake thanksgiving ! ryann came too. we made quorn roast, gravy, mashed potatoes, stuffing, and brussels sprouts, and i brought a cherry pie and some pastries. the food was so good and i had the best time, and i'm glad i got to hang out with ryann again cause she's cool. also thanksgiving is the best possible meal of all time and i want to have it again right now?


someone else's vegan thanksgiving

what else? i'm off of work today because my eye totally sucks. benadryl made the swelling go down, but i didn't take it last night so i could get up for work today, and it came right back. the hydrocortisone my doctor suggested (did i mention that? my doctor suggested benadryl and hydrocortisone on friday for 3 days, and if it wasn't gone today, come back) seemed to make my face redder, and the really itchy spot is my tear duct. this really, really sucks.

what else? oh, in times of stress, i get fixated on stupid things. troll dolls. bill paxton. floaty pens. right now, it's, uh, how i met your mother. i will say right off- this show is not funny. it has a good cast (minus the main character, who is like jimmy fallon taped off the radio, and then someone made a tape of that tape, and so on and so on and so on) and good writers and almost good jokes, but the delivery of every line is so horrible, the laugh track is really weak and oddly placed, ugh. it's a TERRIBLE show. and yet i am downloading all five seasons and have bought some episodes on itunes.



- why would the main character's voice change as he aged so he turns into bob saget instead of having the same voice?
- how do two assholes in nyc afford such a HUGE apartment?
- how do they afford to go drinking every single night?
- why bother living in nyc if they don't go anywhere but their apartment and the bar directly downstairs?
- some of the stuff barney does is super sketchy/sexual assault-y. why are they friends with him? especially the women?
- who on earth would tell their children some of the stuff that goes on on this show? why would a child ever care how their parents met?
- why am i so attracted to jason segel?

these are questions i cannot answer. i hope this passes soon.

anywayyyyyy see you tomorrowwww