heroinnnnnnn, be the death of me !

okay, i'm going to give this a whirl again. i'm NOT going to catch you guys up on the months i haven't been updating, because that would be annoying and i don't want to, but i'll fill you in on SOME stuff.

i was out of work for like one billion weeks recently because i gravely injured my back. i have an old injury, and i mysteriously reinjured it a few weeks ago. it was rough- i couldn't get out of bed, i couldn't stand up, and laying in bed was making it way worse. i ended up getting a prescription for vicodin, which i was reluctant to take, but a regimen of vicodin and aleve (and sleeping on my side on the couch) got me to a point where i can like... mostly walk around. it really hurts if i stand still for a long time, but walking isn't too bad and sitting up isn't too bad and sleeping isn't too bad.



i'm back at work now, but as a result of laying around for like 2 weeks in my livingroom, basically unable to do anything, a few things happened:

1) i finally learned how to use the appletv and started... watching television. i have a tough time paying attention to television or really WATCHING any show because i just tune it out, but there were entire days where i could literally do nothing but lay on my side facing the telvision. i watched all of parks and recreation, which i loved- actual feminist main character who identifies as feminist, and only ONE JOKE in all 3 seasons that has disappointed me ("on a scale of one to chris brown, how mad is he?"). i was cautious watching the first three seasons because i figured it would turn into a moronic rape joke bonanza like 30 rock, but so far it's smart and funny without selling out women. oh and uh, i also watched top chef.



2) there was a wasp or hornet in my livingroom and it made me insane. it was a baby, and it landed on me several times without stinging me, so... i decided it thought i was its mother and that it would never sting me. i spent days feebly trying to prevent my cat from attacking him and i named him rodney, and then i leaned on him by accident and he stung my elbow. after four hours of deliberation, i flushed him down the toilet, and i've never felt so guilty. the sting didn't leave a mark for the first two days, but then became so itchy and inflamed that i thought it was infected. it seems to be clearing up now though. alas poor rodney.



3) i spent a lot of time with biz, my middle school best friend who coincidentally also lives here. she kept me company while i was immobile and dirty and complaining constantly.

toward the end of the week, i was actually able to move a little bit, so i made myself a pair of those stupid twilight mittens :( i'll be done with them tonight, probably. i bought a red/blue/white plaid jacket that only has half sleeves, so i decided to make a pair of red mittens to keep my arms warm.




in berocco vintage in sour cherry

i also made myself another star-crossed slouchy beret (also berocco vintage, in 'tidepool') but i'm never going to wear it because i hate how i look in hats !



hmm. what else? i dropped all of my classes for this semester (i am just too anxious lately and i need some time off to take a breather and reorient) and i really, really need to finish my genocide paper. i just completely choked like i never have in my entire life, ever. i've been doing lots of reading and have my research organized, but the longer i put this paper off, the less i want to do it. i recently got to hang out with my friend natalie (another friend from middle school, who is also great) and she very very sternly chided me about how i need to get this done and not let it hang over my head for the rest of my life (or at least the rest of my school career), and she's totally right. so, maybe soon i'll take a weekend to work on the paper.

not this weekend, though- this weekend, i'm going to brooklyn to adopt a beautiful white fluffy dreamboat cat. i'm sufficiently healed, i think, after weirdo's death from kidney failure, and i'm ready for the cat of my dreams. there's a few things i have to do this week which may be difficult (lots of cleaning and rearranging, which is going to hurt my back) to get ready for the cat, but i think it's worth it.



his current name is mr. puffins buttttt i'm going to change it. he's 10 years old and only has one tooth and is a big fluffy dreamboat and he's beautiful and i already love him. he's basically my dream cat- his m.o. is to curl up next to you and sleep and is into a LITTLE petting but isn't a petting maniac like my current cat. i'm excited and can't wait to get him and can't wait for him to be best buds with pizza and to put on a fancy dress and pet him all the time and eat out of a goblet with him.

this is a little harried because i have to get back to work, but i swear i'll write much more thorough and better entries in the future. if i keep this up, which i may not.

i'd love to love you, lover

dudes ! dudes ! i seriously did zero work this weekend and i'm freaking out ! i don't know what's wrong with me ! usually i am a master procrastinator, which means i procrastinate but am able to get things done by a deadline, but i really dropped the ball. i think my big problem here is my writing assignment, because nothing on earth interests me less. to be fair, though, i'm behind on a genocide assignment too, and nothing interests me more.


the most interesting search result for "procrastination." poor guy.

on friday, i...? i'm not sure. i got a car to go to whole foods, but i didn't realize it was like 9:30 at night, so i ended up dropping my laundry off and wandering around cvs for awhile. i'd had 9 shots of espresso at that point so i was mentally insane, and i stopped at a light next to a giant mcrib billboard and was totally perplexed by it. now, i have eaten a mcrib before ! i know about mcribs ! i call those morningstar riblets 'mcribs'. furthermore, the billboard featured a giant picture of a mcrib. despite all of that information, i stared at it for the duration of a light and could not figure out what the sign said. i was like, "m.. crib? m.c. rib? m crib?" please note that i also know what mcdonalds is and am familiar with their naming convention.



on saturday, i cleaned my room a little (not totally) and went to the green line to study. this did not go well, but i had a wonderful time hanging out by myself listening to weird al. also, patchie came in and hung out with me and it was the first time i ever hung out with her FOR REAL, and she is fucking cool. she let me windbag her about genocide and we talked about what a dork god is. mouse met up with us after that and he and i went grocery shopping and came back to my house to watch the masque of mandragora. it was awesome to hang out and watch doctor who with him (and eat the thanksgiving food i bought for $1000000 from whole foods' hot bar !) because we haven't had time to hang out for real in weeks.



i have the novelization of this story (because i suck), and i'd always pronounced it man-dra-GOR-uh but it turns out it's man-DRAG-or-uh ! fascinating ! basically a ball of energy and that dr. doom guy were going to prevent the renaissance from happening through fake doctor who science and some people got caught on fire and the doctor stole two horses. not too bad? i have specific interest in people getting all burnt up in a movie (especially if a charred skeleton is left behind !) so i was satisfied, but mouse was disappointed that the doctor didn't kick anyone in the nuts. after mouse went home i stayed up late and accidentally ended up watching a softcore hbo porno called "cougar school" which had serious script problems.

on sunday, christina invited me to get ethiopian breakfast with her and amber !!! i had to study, but i realized that i wouldn't have actually studied if i didn't go, so i went with them. amber is the best- she's so funny and cool and it's great to have other friends who understand anxiety junk. neither of them had ever been to abyssinia for breakfast/brunch before and they loved it as much as i do ! sigh. amber got the ye'inqulal tibias (which is scrambled eggs with cool spices and hot peppers and tomatoes and onions), and christina had her first bowl of foul <3<3<3<3<3 i also got dabo fitfit for all of us, which is just... french bread ripped up and soaked in a spicy tomato and onion sauce, which sounds super simple but is like one of the best things i've ever tasted.



we got coffee at the green line after that and had a wonderful time talking and sitting in the window seat. eric was working and he told me he saw me on ravelry, which is probably like... the least embarrassing time anyone has commented on my internet activity. i trieddddd to do some work when they left but i got caught in a weird youtube loop where i tried to find every instance of cookie monster wearing clothes (healthy food rap, various monsterpiece theaters, etc.). jesse and her friends also came by for a minute and entertained me, so i gave up and spent $40 at cvs buying like, lipsmackers and arm hair bleach.


i'm beggin' of you, please don't burn my arms

at hoooooome i tried again to do some reading, but i ended up talking to christina about the x-files, fucking with the cats, posting romantic stuff on facebook, and re-organizing my itunes. i did like one third of one assignment at some point (which took like 20 minutes, leading me to believe that i could've done all that work in 2 hours or so !).

sooooo today i have a bunch of work stuff to do, and i'm going to try for a miracle as far as getting school stuff done at lunch. i need to take a trip to the mouse-infested library (i mean that in a good way, because i have positive feelings about vermin) at some point today too because i need to bring shit to class. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i have so much to do !

p.s. i'm taking a mental health day tomorrow !